This is not really a post.

See, the title didn't even get formatted as a title.

Gah, I fail. I know. I'M SORRY! I've been crazy busy. It's Finals Week. Buuut, I still totally have news, and the next legit post will even have pictures, or maybe even a video!

But for real, I have sooooooo much to show you, so put up with my crap for just a little bit longer. It's Chridmats time anyway, so y'all should be way too busy doing that whole mess to even worry about me. I promise, it will be one hell of a haul video/photofest/whatever. Seriously though, since the last time I posted, I have bought no fewer than 100 new pigments or eyeshadows - no fewer, but probably some greater.

Please Know: I'm Still Alive

See also: The Cake is a Lie.

I promise a more legitimate post will be forthcoming. At some forth.

As many of you know, this tends to be a tough time of year for me. 2 jobs plus fulltime school is not exactly conducive to....well...anything.

But-but-but I HAVE SO MUCH CRAP TO SHARE WITH YOU GUYS!!!!

I can't wait to tell you all about my Horror Block subscription, the new makeup and clothing brands I've ordered from, and a little bit about my Halloween costume plans. And of course an update on my birthday, my boyfriend, and more of my recent purchases. I have a problem, you guys. For real.

Anyway, forthcoming. Someone please remind me of this in the next week or two.

I WILL Require It

The rules of commercial products making me happy is simple. I don't understand why the world feels the need to screw with me. My criteria are simple. If it's Final Fantasy- I want it. If Yoshitaka Amano did art for it- I want it. If it's a Collector's Edition Final Fantasy with cover art by Mr. Amano- why the hell did no one tell me about this?! On that note- I may have just spent $80 on the FFXIV Collector's Edition with cover art by Yoshitaka Amano.

A Diatribe for the Ages

I may be overselling this slightly. But I just have a couple of things I want to bring up as topic for discussion.

1. Gamer Girls

What is the deal with this?? Seriously.
"Yes. I am a girl. Who games."

Uh, congrats. You do realize this is nothing new, right? I've been "gaming" since I was coordinated enough to work a d-pad and 2 buttons (was that just last week? Sheesh, feels like a life time). Shit girl, I've been "gaming" since I was a baby. Maybe even a zygote.

Shuddup. Girls play games. Girls have always played games. You're not special. Girls have played games for as long as both girls and games have been a thing.

2. Nerdery in Pop Culture

Is it awesome? Absolutely. Except when it gets screwed up. Which is often. But sometimes it's even still cool then. Just in a slightly different way - see... Well... Nothing comes immediately to mind, but I know it has happened. Whatever. Not really the issue. I take issue with the fact that all the kids who shit all over me for being a nerd or weirdo in the past are now the same ones invariably hashtagging all over Facebook with crap like, "Can't wait for the new comic/fantasy/sci-fi whatever with the hubs. Super-turbo-lulz!" Ugh, cram it. Liking "nerd stuff" makes people subhuman, remember?

Am I bitter? Yeah, a little. I feel a bit like my identity is being stolen a little piece at a time. Am I being dramatic? For sure. Hormones, probably. It's always hormones. So, take that.

Don't get me wrong, this stuff totally deserves attention on a mass scale (mostly). I just don't exactly get the warm and fuzzies from seeing these things enjoyed by the same people who judged the nerds, freaks, and weirdos unquestioningly for enjoying the very same things prior to Hollywood getting their poisened little mittens all over them.

End rant.

Drops mic.

The Great Patio Farden Project of 2014

I have recently decided that patio farming/gardening - or fardening if you will, is the way to go. So, since I can't ever do anything small scale, I have essentially set up to have my own produce section. I am less than one week into the fardening process, and already it has proven to be a fun, successful experiment in science and future food. And agriculture. Can't forget about that. I'm learning things and stuff.

It is so exciting, in fact, that I have decided that you will all get to enjoy it with me. So... behold my (future) spoils!

BEHOLD THEM!

And ignore my terrible pictures- I'm working with a barely-living decade and some change old, chintzy when it was brand new camera.

 Cabbage and Pickling Cucumbers- also, Poppies in the background.

 Garlic and a mystery plan. Also featured - my Hoya and Christmas Cactus. They felt left out.

 Lemon Cucumbers and some things I neglected to label. Pretty sure they are hot pepper and sweet pepper mixes.

 Tomato Rocket! I expected rockets. I was mildly disappointed.

 Cilantro and Eggplant in case reading isn't your strong point. They are being annoying and slow.

 Eureka Beans and Arctic Crisp Lettuce

 Green Onion and Garlic Chives

Spinach and Looseleaf Lettuce Blend

 I am not sure what I will do with these when they outgrow their starter pots - which I anticipate happening very soon. I have a palette that I am going to use, but I am not sure how I want to go about that yet, although I do have a few ideas. Any opinions/ideas would not be discouraged.

Le Haul - As Promised

I promised, and so - I deliver.
Here be all the crap I have bought and/or cobbled together. recently. And by crap I mean awesome stuff. And by recently I mean in the last few weeks.

There will be other stuff too. Don't worry.

First, the MAGIC TOWELS. DON'T ASK SHAWN WHAT THEY ARE. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD - JUST DON'T. There was Everything For Dollars weirdness involved. But yeah, so, from the top we have Raphael, Thor, Tiki Scooby, and Hawkeye. Also, magic. Lots of magic.

Then, there is Beauty and the Beast and Snow White cups. Remember those? Pretty cool, right? Thanks check out counter at my local Goodwill!

 These. These came from Savers. They're weird Gaiman/Escher-y fantastical scenes. And it's freakin' framed contact paper. I'm not even kidding. I must know what was previously lined with this! My vote is for some sort of Wardrobe-to-Narnia or some such. (Also, how much do you love the red walls?

 And thennnnn... My dead stuff serving tray set thingy. Again, Savers. Or maybe Goodwill. It all kind of blurs together at some point. Anyhoo, that is tatted lace with butterflies and small dried plants under glass. Coasters and serving tray. SCOOOORE! DEAD BUGS!

 The next two pictures are primarily the fabled manga haul. The top 2 shelves in the first picture and the top shelf in the second. That is soooooooo much. I don't know how I'm ever going to read it all! Just kidding, I totally will. No problem.

And my weird geek walls. This one is Lenore (new and old runs), my one and only Squee, and a fabulous alternate cover of Sandman Overture Numero Uno.

The Fables Wall. Terrible pictures, I know. But it is what it is. And it ain't done. It's just done for now. These are some of my favorite covers.

And the Simpsons movie poster wall. They are cut down to 8x10, but there is Wizard of Oz, Night of the Living Ned, The Teacher From the Black Lagoon, and Planet of the Apus. Yay for Axman cutting mats and X-acto knives. 

Not pictured- all the shit I bought from Axman. It's all incredibly cool, but mostly less showy. Although I did pick up a super-cool old school X-men magnet.

In other news, today I planted a bunch of veggies and herbs. Now Shawn is going to help me realize my dream of vertical patio sustenance gardening. I think it's going to be fun! And don't you worry. I'll feed you, baby birds- you'll get plenty of lame progress shots.

In other-other news,  camping again in 2 weeks. I can't wait! In Brainerd, so I can see my most beautiful niece. She pretty much demanded it.

They Live (Maybe just "I Live")

I'm still alive. I moved. I am finally getting settled, and unpacked and all that.

In more interesting news, here's the last search that led to my blog:

How to say "feed the llamas" in Spanish

That was a Bing search. Yeah, Bing. Let that soak in. I am both overjoyed and confused. I didn't know anyone actually used Bing.... It's like Zune- I just assumed it was made up....

That's it. That's all I've got.

Well, it isn't, but I don't really feel like writing anymore. Back to beer and Fables it is....


I'll be back with more recent haul posts later. I swear.

PS- I am strongly considering starting another blog where I review the epic shit-tons of cosmetics that I purchase... Would anyone actually read that? - if you're into that sort of stuff, I mean.

As Promised

So, here are my recent scores.

Free Comic Book Day and other various comic scoreage:

 I apologize for the trash pictures, but, this is 4 issues of Lenore. Most of them from the new volume, but that first one is from the, well, first...

 6 new Fables.

Judge Dredd/Mars Attacks crossover- I hope you can comprehend how insanely awesome this is. 

 Squee (I framed it. It did not come that way).

Special Edition Sandman: Overtures (again, I framed).

Other various finds- mostly thrift shop stuff:

 Can we focus on that Spawn? 

And sadly, the buttons are barely visible, but there are: one Punisher logo, one amazing Deadpool button that reads "Best. Button. Ever!", one DC Bombshells Poison Ivy, one Joker/Harley Quinn, and one Genuine Monster Parts. 

This one was a gift, which made me like it even more.

And then there were the Hercules action figures I put up on my Facebook page yesterday. And that is basically it. I mean, I got other little things here and there, but not stuff that is easily photographed and shared. Or that you guys would conceivably care about. So, this is what you get....

Stuff What Happened in Absentia

I know, I know. I've been slacking. I kinda forgot I had a blog until New {name redacted for privacy} (who may be known as that forever; I'm sorry) pointed out that my last post was like a week or a few days after our first date which quickly turned into many more dates, and then a full-blown, totally fun and awesome relationship that has not gotten any less fun and awesome in the ensuing month and change. So, as much as I want to remember that, time passes and whatnot.
I'm still being kinda lazy, so you guys won't get anything of substance yet, but sometime in the next few days I would love to update you on my Free Comic Book Day scores, and my various amazing thrift store finds. It has definitely been a productive couple of weeks.

In other news: almost fishing time for me!!! I can't wait!!!!!

And my beautiful baby girl who is not at all a baby, nor actually mine is all set to graduate high school this summer, so... If any of is felt young a second ago, we may as well just get the fuck over that right now...

Yeah, that's all you get for now. I'm typing this on a cell phone while sitting in the middle of my hallway surrounded by dirty laundry. It feels weird, so I'm going to make it stop.

Deuces!

Now Featuring Positivity!

I realized today that I never really blog about nice things. So.......NICE THINGS!

One Nice Thing:
I just got back from MSI. Faith in humanity partially restored. No, not really. But faith in Jimmy Urine cemented. He is just an amazing human being. <----Fact of the Day

Two Nice Thing:
I went on a date earlier this week. It was very nice, and he was very nice. Much nicer than the dates I usually go on. Which, I grant, is none- but that's not really the point. It was all good things. And yes, there will be a second. And I wouldn't hate it if there were some more after that. <---- Second Fact of the Day

Three Nice Thing: Ethel. Sweet, beautiful Ethel. I bought her, and I am now deeply, violently in love with her. For those of you who pay no attention to my Facebook dickery, Ethel is my new car. She is a Mazda3 iTouring. And she's beautiful. <---- Third Fact of the Day

Ok, I'm tired of listing nice things.

I forgot to do my Friday homework. Oops. That's probably bad. I'm still not really sleeping, so I blame that. Fer fuck.

And I started playing South Park Stick of Truth. Partially because it's on loan from a friend, and I'm sure he'd like to get it back at some point, and partially because I'm fucking sick of trying to sneak around the stupid Pig Castle in stupid Pig Armor in Ni No Kuni. It's infuriating because I continue to fail miserably at it. I keep getting caught and having to start over. I should kill all the Pig People and feast on Pig People Bacon. I imagine it is somewhat like Canadian Bacon, only not made with Beaver Filler.

Today I bought the first Preacher. And I hope I will like it. I also bought a Lenore single issue. Because I thought the cover was really good. But I thought a few of the new issues had great covers, so I don't really remember which one I decided was Most Good. It's in Ethel. And Ethel is sleeping in her garage spot. It's cold and I'm lazy, so I guess I will wait until I need to leave for a different reason before this mystery can be solved.

I remembered today that I really like being hermity. Like, a lot. I really wish that I never had to leave my house. Unless I wanted to. Like, if I was going on a second date. I could be persuaded to leave for that. Or if MSI played another show, but nobody else was there. Or, like 12 other people, tops.

I was told after the show that I apparently called some guy a douche several times over the course of a conversation that lasted about 2 minutes, so I feel pretty good about that. I wasn't really paying attention to what I was saying- my mouth was on autopilot (as is tradition). I have no problem believing it though. He really was an enormous douche-canoe.

Oh, fun story- at the show, my Local Fashion Hero was mere feet from me. And I didn't fawn over her, or be stalkery. I thought about it, but then I realized that would require that I speak to a person who wasn't Andrea. And then I got really uncomfortable feeling. Oh, Samantha Rei, I do so love everything that you do. And your welcome for not terrifying you with my weird, stalky behavior.

Alright, I don't feel like sharing anymore right now.

Stuff that happened while..... While you were away.

                                                           Because Mel Brooks

Well, I am almost done with The Guild. And more frightened of Wil Wheaton than ever. How is it that Wesley Crusher grew up to be kinda awesome? And have a great, if somewhat douchey voice. It just ain't right. I hate Wesley. I don't care what anyone says. He was a little d-bag. Kind of a badass, but still. THE SWEATERS!!!

And now, "Bevahhly" (Picard voice. Picard voice, dammit!)

I ordered some new Fables. 11, 12, and 13. Only to find out that I had never actually bought 10. Sigh.

I've spent more time hanging around myself. This was an MST3K night. It was glorious.

I don't really have things to talk about, per se, but I want to talk. You'll listen, and you'll pretend to like it.

I learned that if you go anywhere in the known world, you will be attacked by Pokémon, and you will die. Especially if you go to Australia, Tokyo, or California. There, death is certain. I caught 'em all, bitches! Thanks Google... I'm a bigger loser than I was 48 hours ago. Fuckin' sweet.

I will find out if I can get my car tomorrow. I really hope so, as mine is now making gurgly-engine-explodey sounds. Disappointed Face.

Ok, that's it. I've got nothing. I'm going to go back to burying myself in Ni No Kuni. Time to dress up in piggy armor and go invade a castle.

Well, this is what I really want to say-

 

 

                                      But this one seems more fitting, all things considered.                                       

Stolen from the internet, because I'm lazy. And uncool. Don't listen to what anyone tells you. I'm not cool.

I am lazy. I'm sorry. You can hit me if you want.

I haven't posted on here in almost 2 MONTHS! Why isn't there someone out there to remind me that I have, like, social obligations. Well, that I'm socially obligated to rant about nothing and then spam my friends with the aforementioned rants...

Urgh. I've been busy failing rather roundly at life. No house. That's really my only failure, but... Meh. Now I'm trying to buy a car, because... Yay, Capitalism!

But really, I want the this:

Yep. I like the hatchback. It's sexy. Like a big, sexy station wagon full of sex. Or car. I don't know, really. I have a lot of junk in my trunk, is what I'm saying. Or I'd put a lot of junk in it. Fuck, I don't know. Probably the last one. I'm a hoarder. Sad Face.

Seriously though. I've been annoyingly emo lately. Showering has even become difficult. And I don't care. I mean, I still shower, but probably not as often as I should. Because I don't want to. So what. You don't have to smell me. Unless you do, in which case- I'm sorry, but I still don't care. It's work. And I'm tired of work. Always with the working... There's a Fest quote in there. It might have even made it into the Best Of. Can you find it?!

I finished Zom-baby. Is that what I named him? I don't remember. But anyway, he's mostly done. Although I want to repaint his eyes a nice milky white... I don't remember how the black happened. Probably because I got lazy. I do that sometimes.
                      
El Zombirino. That's right. Thanks saved images. Wow, those pictures are crappy and overexposed. My bad. Clearly I am not a budding photographer. Anyway, he's complete with bite wound and boils. Which I made with a glue stick/glue gun combo. Also, paint. Lot's of paint. He's not technically finished, but anyone who knows me knows that I rarely finish any of the 9 bajillion arts and crafts projects I start. I lack follow through. I was tempted to try and knock a hole in his face for dramatic (rotty) effect, but I was concerned that he would break and I'd be out $2.99. That would be tragic.

Also, zefrank1. Seriously. Find him on the YouTubes. Or follow my link. Don't let a cuttlefish near your face.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/GDwOi7HpHtQ" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Did that work? No. Fuck. Try again. Second try- YouTube can fuck right off. Right off...
Okay, ya know what? You need to do the leg work. It's worth it, I promise. And I tried. Just so you know. I didn't even add commentary for each attempt, or it would have been SO MUCH LONGER. But really, watch the video. And then watch other ones. I also like the owl. And the armadildo. Oops. Typo. Sorry.

All Your Nightmares is Belongs to Me!

This has been a banner weekend for me. I went shopping, and so many creepy things did I buy!

We will start here:

 
My beautiful, NIB Sideshow brand Evil Ash

$25 American. Can you believe it? I couldn't! These things tend to sell for at least double, but usually triple that. Thanks local comic supplier! I'm a little bit in love with him. I would be even happier if it was S-Mart Ash, the Pit Witch, or 2 headed Ash, but whatevs. Evil Ash is still pretty bitchin'.

Next, I found this little buddy at a thrift shop:

His dead eyes were staring directly into my soul.

 

He is tentatively named El Zombirino, solely because I recently watched the Big Lebowski. I will be giving him the zombie-paint treatment soon (and I will be posting pictures of the finished product), at which point I will be re-naming him Keith, because that is a wretched name that makes me think of dead things.

 

Aaaand thennnn:

 

Le Fop

 

You may be asking yourself, "Is that gold leaf trimming his coat?" Why, no, it is not. I got him at a thrift shop, what do you want?! It's so much classier than all that nouveau-riche gold leaf shit. That right there is real, American, or possibly Chinese chunky gold glitter. Like he was trimmed by a 4 year old. He's totally bangin'.

 

Round Whatever We're On:

 





                                                                        I want to hug your insidey parts!

He plants bad dreams all up inside you while you sleep. Seriously, though- I brought all this crap over to my dad's house to show it all off (mostly Ash, because I knew he'd be all high school girl jealous), and he actually made me remove Nightmare Bear from his presence immediately because he said it was the most terrifying thing he had ever seen. I wish the picture did him justice- he really is spectacularly creepy.

And then, because I need these things to complete me:

Well, this picture accomplishes nothing, really, but I did add a few new graphic novels to the collection. What you can't see, but are new anyway, so shut up- yesterday I picked up Spawn issues 2&3, Neil Gaiman's Sandman vol. 2, and issues 1&2 of Strange Tales featuring stories by Jhonen Vasquez and Junko Mizuno. I later came home, went online, and ordered Spawn #1 as well as 2 Anita Blake graphic novel compilations because I'm missing Guilty Pleasures vol 2, so I just got the compilations of all the Guilty Pleasures as well as all of the Laughing Corpse. And then I ordered Purple Nurples. And some more Monster High dolls. Cuz I's a grown up. Oh, and the first Dark Hunters graphic novel, and, I don't know, probably some other crap I don't need but do.

Ohhhh, aaaaaaand, my Valentines themed Darth Vader cookie jar should arrive by Tuesday.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00B86AF7S/ref=oh_details_o01_s01_i01?ie=UTF8&psc=1
That link be the link to the gorgeous gent in question. Click it. CLICK IT. CLICK IT OR DIE!

I Want to be a Butterfly Now, Dammit!

I have nothing of real value to say, other than that I may be having an early onset midlife crisis of some sort.

I'm tired of being a stupid caterpillar.  I want to be a stupid butterfly now.

Also, I itch. Oh, the itching. Maybe that's my problem. Stupid medicine is half gone and I'm still rashy. And tired. And nauseous. Prednizone is the Devil.

OH THE ITCHY, SCRATCHY AGONY!!

'Bout to Unleash Some TV-Related Bitchery

Let me start this post by saying, I am in LOVE with Once Upon a Time. Like, stand outside its window with binoculars and a video camera kind of love.
That being said- I am really freaking annoyed right now. I waited too long to watch it on Netflix, and then watched the first two seasons in a creepily short time period. So, I went to ABC.com and discovered that, since I STILL didn't finish it fast enough, they have taken the first 4 episodes of Season 3 down. So, I either wait 9,000,000 years for Netflix to put up the full season, or I start 4 episodes in. Needless to say, I will be waiting. But I am NOT happy about it.

So... I decided to take another stab at season 8 of Supernatural. I love that show. Maybe loved. I don't know. Jury is still out. Halfway through the season, they finally decided to give a few episodes worth of break time from a rather tiresome story arc, and give me a few great one-offs, so that's nice. And Dean is purdy. That doesn't hurt.

Now, let's head back to Storybrooke. Hehe, see what I did there?

Seriously- where did they find these people (aside from Rumplestiltskin, who they found in Trainspotting, and Emma, the babe from House)?!  Actually, most important question- where did they find Hook? And can I go there? Maybe bring back a souvenir? Sweet Mother Superior (ooh, there it is again!), that is a FINE looking Irish Gentleman.

One last thing. As a sort of side-note: As previously mentioned, I am watching Supernatural, and it's an episode about LARP-ers. And the village they have built for their LARP-ing looks hilariously like a mashup of Fest and Robin Hood Men in Tights. It's making me giggle. Just sayin'.

And so I leave you with Felicia Day & Jensen Ackles looking gorgeous as per usual. You're welcome.