Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Desperately Seekin Susan

"Susan" being my search for a home's new codename.

As those of you who bother correspondence with me outside Facebook are likely well aware, I have been looking to buy a home for quite some time. I looked at one last weekend (at least I think it was then. Time flies/squishes together incoherently when you have a depressingly predictable schedule), and am STILL waiting to hear back from the realtor. Bah humbug, fuckin jerk holidays!

I am getting a smidge antsy, as my last decent neighbour abandoned me last weekend. I am now literally surrounded by idiots. There are the frumpy, horrid, grunt-humpy neighbors to the left, the smelly pothead across, the rhinoceri upstairs, and the Kid Rock/News at Five year at the corner. And an empty apartment which I assume will soon be inhabited by Juggalos. Which will make for 1939's second set. Of Juggalos, I mean. Isn't that awful?! 

Maybe they'll just cut the fucking around and just allow the rest of the circus into Girl Neighbor' s vacated domicile. That would only make sense at this point...

Anyway, back to The House. The House is very near to my current location, and has a BACKYARD. So I could have a dog. Not a hamster, like, a REAL DOG. I need that house. And I need it before my lease is up in January, so I don't have to get my already ludicrous rent jacked up another $25. 


P.S. I have just gone to the trouble of putting on pants to check the mail as I'm expecting a package, only to discover that usps has apparently taken a Snow Day. Really?! I suspect this has something to do with why you are falling out of favor... Ya know who didn't get a fucking Snow Day?! Everyone else!

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