Because Time Travel

Now that I've written something again, I can't seem to stop. You don't know this, but I'm writing to you from the past (yay, scheduling!). I have decided that Cast Puppies need to be discussed. I feel like this is very important.

Last night, in the throes of cold medicine-induced delusions, I found myself explaining to Shawn that if I could just get my hands on a "large, majestic puppy," and 6 leg casts (2 human and 4 puppy shaped), I could quit my job and survive comfortably on the donations of others. See, we would hobble together through parks the world over, and politely explain to any who would listen (well, I would - clearly this kind of thing is not in the puppy's wheelhouse. He could only communicate it to other puppies. Unless, he's a magic puppy like Air Bud - but I digress). In hindsight, I realize this would be a con - and not really in line with my moral compass and/or general work ethic, but I was relatively certain that it would be a perfectly acceptable life choice.

I feel that it is worth mentioning that this whole line of conversation began because I started by....

EXPLAINING THAT FREE CANDY ONLY HELPS KIDNAP CHILDREN AND IDIOTS, AND THAT THE TICKET TO TEENS OR ADULTS IS TO CARRY A BOX OF INJURED PUPPIES IN YOUR VAN, BUT...SPOILER ALERT: THEY AREN'T REALLY INJURED (you're not a monster) THEY'RE WEARING CASTS FOR PRETEND - TO HELP YOU KIDNAP BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU HAPPY AND THEYJUSTLOVEYOUSOMUCHANDWANTYOUTOBEHAPPY.

So, yeah. That all happened.

I have so much to write, and so little motivation to write it.

The world is a big, scary....thing, and I haven't really felt like being an active part of it in quite some time. Sorry.

There, now that's been said, let's move on, shall we?

My brother got married recently. It was a perfectly short ceremony, and I cried. A lot. Probably while loudly protesting that I was not crying. It's all a bit of a blur, really. I will try to explain myself here, because it might make my behavior seem less awkward in hindsight.

First, there were, like, 20 people there that I didn't know. Crowds and/or strangers stress me out. Possibly because I'm defective. Also, my niece was the most adorable tiny lady I have ever seen - as always. I was really proud of/uncomfortable with my brother being such a fucking adult all of a sudden.

And then shit got super crazy up inside my brains. I started thinking about how suddenly I have this new family member. And a sister, no less. And why do I only hear from the sister I ALREADY HAVE (every few years) ONLYWHENSHEWANTSMONEYORTOUSEMYCAR?! WHYISTHISMYLIFE?! And then I realized I was being insane, so I made my brain stop trying to do...whatever the shit that was.

To summarize: I think I can safely say now that I know what temporary insanity feels like.

That's all you get for now.maybe next time we can talk about me and a puppy in leg casts and why this is the future of wealth.

Random Update

I have been getting really overwhelmed by EVERYTHING lately. Like, it has gotten bad enough that most days, I actually struggle to leave the house. Work, school, life, the world, people... It is just freaking me out. A lot. So, I was thinking - (bear with me, this is going to get a little...snakey...)

I have a ton of makeup. Like, seriously, you would be horrified. There's sooo much of it. And I buy new stuff pretty regularly. At last count I had over 300 different eyeshadows. I probably have 30 different shades of lipstick. Hell, I have nail polish for basically every conceivable situation.

But! There is a reason for this seemingly random statement. Makeup, to me, is sort of like battle armor. When I take the time to put on makeup, I feel...a little better. Better about myself, better about life, and better about the world in general.

So, I think I have found a solution to whatever this is that makes me freak the hell out every time I have to be in public with more than, like, 5 people: FULL ON BODY PAINT.

Just kidding, I know that is fucking ludicrous (although the horrors of my makeup addiction are very, very real). But seriously, this is a very real problem for me right now. I now regularly freak out in public. Like, sweating, heart-racing, might vomit, and I'm just generally becoming more and more unpleasant to be around out in the real world. Does that happen to any of you readers (assuming there are readers)? What do you do? Is there any way to deal with this that doesn't involve my life spinning horribly out of control when I become hopelessly, Requiem for a Dream-ly addicted to weird crazy pills?

Magic potions, Harry Potter spells, mantras, gris-gris, anything?!

I suck at having a blog.

I do. I know. School, life, excuses, etc.

But just for a moment, can we talk about how right the world is right now?

I graduate in May.

I just got back from a wonderful vacation with the most amazing boyfriend I could ever have hoped for.

There will soon be a baby AFP/Neil Gaiman.

AND IT'S ZOMBEAVERS EVE!

Life feels pretty good right now.

This is not really a post.

See, the title didn't even get formatted as a title.

Gah, I fail. I know. I'M SORRY! I've been crazy busy. It's Finals Week. Buuut, I still totally have news, and the next legit post will even have pictures, or maybe even a video!

But for real, I have sooooooo much to show you, so put up with my crap for just a little bit longer. It's Chridmats time anyway, so y'all should be way too busy doing that whole mess to even worry about me. I promise, it will be one hell of a haul video/photofest/whatever. Seriously though, since the last time I posted, I have bought no fewer than 100 new pigments or eyeshadows - no fewer, but probably some greater.

Please Know: I'm Still Alive

See also: The Cake is a Lie.

I promise a more legitimate post will be forthcoming. At some forth.

As many of you know, this tends to be a tough time of year for me. 2 jobs plus fulltime school is not exactly conducive to....well...anything.

But-but-but I HAVE SO MUCH CRAP TO SHARE WITH YOU GUYS!!!!

I can't wait to tell you all about my Horror Block subscription, the new makeup and clothing brands I've ordered from, and a little bit about my Halloween costume plans. And of course an update on my birthday, my boyfriend, and more of my recent purchases. I have a problem, you guys. For real.

Anyway, forthcoming. Someone please remind me of this in the next week or two.

I WILL Require It

The rules of commercial products making me happy is simple. I don't understand why the world feels the need to screw with me. My criteria are simple. If it's Final Fantasy- I want it. If Yoshitaka Amano did art for it- I want it. If it's a Collector's Edition Final Fantasy with cover art by Mr. Amano- why the hell did no one tell me about this?! On that note- I may have just spent $80 on the FFXIV Collector's Edition with cover art by Yoshitaka Amano.